Humainologie creative dialogue team practice Zoom link for this Wednesday Nov 4 and the pandemic
- Arthur Clark
- Nov 1, 2020
- 4 min read
“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” - Maya Angelou
Here is the Zoom link provided by Greg for our creative dialogue team practice, to start at 6:30 PM on Wednesday November 4
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Meeting ID: 834 5027 0263
Passcode: 646459
Our overarching purpose for the weekly team practice sessions is to steadily build our powers of creativity. My question for you (and for myself) is whether we can take that general definition of our goal and define it in a more detailed and inspiring way, to guide how we use our time and develop our potential at each and every team practice.
There are, of course, many ways of doing that. Here is one example. There are opportunities hidden inside every problem. One way of defining our goal in a more detailed way would be as follows: We will develop the habit of seeing problems as opportunities. We will become better and better at using difficult situations and problems as starting points for creative initiatives.
The pandemic is a difficult situation, and many people are experiencing psychological problems because of it. We can take this opportunity to hone our skills of empathic listening. As luck would have it, someone recently joined our dialogue network who teaches empathic listening skills.
Sloane Dugan sent me his synopsis of a five-step process for clarifying a problem someone else is facing and helping them move toward empowerment. His source for the five-step process is the book The Instinct to Heal by David Servan-Schreiber, MD, PhD.
Sloane has indicated he may be able to facilitate one of our creative dialogue team practice sessions soon. That would be a perfect opportunity for us in these times of the pandemic. It will also enhance our creativity. I’ve appended below this message Sloane’s synopsis of the five-step process as well as part of his introduction to it. (Note: I have made a few very minor editing changes, such as in the font and punctuation, to what Sloane had sent me.)
Arthur
From Sloane: The following brief summary of the BATHEing the Heart process has provided me with a technique that I’ve used in my work with persons in therapy, coaching, and relationships with adults and students over the years. It is an instrumental process that usually helps the Other and has the potential for also empowering him/her. The process seems quite simple, even simplistic. It is neither, but its five steps are learnable. Students in one of my MBA courses become familiar with the technique early in the course and practice using it during the term.
The period of time for working through the five steps may occur in a matter of five to ten minutes. Alternatively, the unfolding process and its subsequent discussions, especially the implementation component after the last step may extend into multiple meetings.
Summary of
BATHEing the Heart:
a Five Step Problem-Clarification and Empowering Process.
The initial four steps have an objective and a key, guiding question. The fifth step has an objective and three follow-up questions.
B for BACKGROUND.
Objective: Help the Other (person) to clarify what happened in their life that seems to be causing suffering.
Focusing Question: “What happened to you?”
A for AFFECT
Objective: Identify what feelings are associated with the suffering. That is, help the Other become more aware of the ‘melody’ that goes with the words from the intellect.
Focusing Question: “And how does that make you feel?”
T for TROUBLE
Objective: Help the Other identify the primary core of the suffering from his/her perspective, right now.
Focusing Question: “And what troubles you the most now?”
H for HANDLING
Objective: Help the Other identify the resources available to her/him that the person can use to cope with what he/she is experiencing and to more proactively begin to change the situation.
Focusing Question: “And what helps you the most to handle this?”
E for EMPATHY
Objective: 1) Demonstrate that you understand key dimension of the situation and thus are an ally for them in their suffering. 2) Summarize in your own words and feelings what the person has experienced in the previous steps. Minimally, the listener may carry out this second objective by restating what s/he has heard. Also, the listener can demonstrate even more empathy by expressing the feelings s/he experienced thus, mirroring the person’s presentation and developing resonance with the Other on multiple levels.
Questions to ask by the end of this step:
What did you learn? Is this incident and your reaction a new experience (that is, for the first time)? and
What did you affirm (that is, what did you already know and learn again)? And (what are the) Next Step(s)?
Source: “Listening with the Heart”. From The Instinct to Heal by David Servan-Schreiber, MD, PhD
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